It is Enough
What do I do with the information that has been given me? Someone discloses something about himself/herself that is very personal, private, and sensitive, what do you do? You are trusted with it and in many ways it is an honor to have this knowledge. But what do you do?
It is as if I have been handed a bomb and told to disarm it. All the while it is counting down...10...9...8... I have to do something with it. I have been handed this bomb before. I was able to just walk away from it and simply ignore it. But now... this time is different. I thought that I had an instruction manual that told me what to do and how to respond but, all of a sudden this manual is written in a foreign language. It is possible to translate it but accurate translation could take months. I do not have months - I must do something. How do I respond?
Quick, maybe I can call someone who will have an answer. It might not be the correct answer but still, some answer is better than none - right? No, that isn't the correct response. Another person's reasoning is not my own. Still, I really want to talk to this other person.
Ok, so I finally offer it up to God. "Here it is Lord. A question, a situation, a person whom you have known longer than I have and what is your response?" "LOVE." "Love? Of course LOVE is the answer but, what do you want me to do??" "Love." "You've said that already, and I agree, however I choose to respond must be with an attitude of love. But I still must act in some certain way." "No, Sarah, listen, just love the person as I love you." With a sigh I respond, "Okay, God, but I don't think I am all that good at it." His response is comforting, "It's all right, I will be here."
My struggle last night really threw me for a loop. There was a restlessness in my spirit all evening. This morning I woke up with two lines of a hymn in my mind and on my lips (I had no clue what any of the other words were until I looked it up this afternoon. I can't remember the last time I sang it but it was in my heart all morning long.) "It is enough that Jesus died, and that He died for me." I found out later that the title of the song is "My Faith has Found a Resting Place." Yes, I need that resting place. He is that place where my faith rests.
The one word that I might change about this song is at the end. Jesus died for more than just me. He died for us! It is with this knowledge and that kind of love that I go forth - living with the questions and responding to others with love.
It is as if I have been handed a bomb and told to disarm it. All the while it is counting down...10...9...8... I have to do something with it. I have been handed this bomb before. I was able to just walk away from it and simply ignore it. But now... this time is different. I thought that I had an instruction manual that told me what to do and how to respond but, all of a sudden this manual is written in a foreign language. It is possible to translate it but accurate translation could take months. I do not have months - I must do something. How do I respond?
Quick, maybe I can call someone who will have an answer. It might not be the correct answer but still, some answer is better than none - right? No, that isn't the correct response. Another person's reasoning is not my own. Still, I really want to talk to this other person.
Ok, so I finally offer it up to God. "Here it is Lord. A question, a situation, a person whom you have known longer than I have and what is your response?" "LOVE." "Love? Of course LOVE is the answer but, what do you want me to do??" "Love." "You've said that already, and I agree, however I choose to respond must be with an attitude of love. But I still must act in some certain way." "No, Sarah, listen, just love the person as I love you." With a sigh I respond, "Okay, God, but I don't think I am all that good at it." His response is comforting, "It's all right, I will be here."
My struggle last night really threw me for a loop. There was a restlessness in my spirit all evening. This morning I woke up with two lines of a hymn in my mind and on my lips (I had no clue what any of the other words were until I looked it up this afternoon. I can't remember the last time I sang it but it was in my heart all morning long.) "It is enough that Jesus died, and that He died for me." I found out later that the title of the song is "My Faith has Found a Resting Place." Yes, I need that resting place. He is that place where my faith rests.
The one word that I might change about this song is at the end. Jesus died for more than just me. He died for us! It is with this knowledge and that kind of love that I go forth - living with the questions and responding to others with love.
yeah, so, i feel alternately honored and horrified at those moments when someone discloses something gravely sensitive. on the one hand, "wow. thank you for trusting me.", on the other, "holy crap, what do i do now?"
ReplyDeletethanks for asking about my grandfather. as far as i know, they're looking into putting him into a longterm care something or other. it's a hard decision to make, for everyone, but it's the only decision that can be made, i think. and so, i guess pray for grace for everyone: for my Mom and her siblings for peace, and for my grandfather for mercy and acceptance.
see you tuesday.